It is with a twinge of sadness that we leave Kellermans. Last night I went to the restaurant where the inmates were all dressed up in their best suits and party dresses for dinner in a dining room exactly as you would imagine, the image only slightly marred by Sophia Loren’s elderly grandma nipping outside for a crafty fag.
I ordered take away pizzas from the window (while everybody stared at me still in my shorts and clearly not dressed for dinner) and they were cooked before my eyes in a wood oven. They were delicious, in fact all the food looked fab, when I’m old I’m going to buy a swimming hat and a shawl with a fringe and stay for the summer.
Before we left the UK I was reliably informed that the Italians don’t like dogs. It was an absolute lie! They love them, Sunny nearly moved in with Grazia, the lady next door to Gina Lollobrigida, he loved her so much. They even have trollies with baskets on for the dog, in the supermarket, I wondered why I was getting funny looks standing outside with Sunny.
We have checked in for our ferry which, fingers crossed, looks like it might actually take us out of Italy and into Greece, we have a couple of hours to wait before we can get on and examine our very very ‘spensive cabin so here’s what I have learned about Italy: The driving is spectacular, R has compared it to playing F1 on the playstation, he’s absolutely loved it, there are no actual rules, the road belongs to whoever is the bravest. It’s a bit like Turkish driving but at high speed! The food is amazing, everywhere, I’ve eaten so much cheese, cheese and jam, cheese and honey (a thing in France too), cheese and salami and so on. The Italians are even less able to communicate in anything other than their own language than the French and the further south you go the less the possibility there is of them even trying. As I didn’t have an Italian dictionary I’m so grateful for my phone, because they don’t even try to help you and I try so hard to learn a bit of the language where ever I go. They are very very friendly though and obviously think I’m mentally incapacitated because I can’t communicate in their language. They all think I’m German.
I can see the ferry from the van now, it’s the red one.
I will be back.