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With only four days to go, which in our family counts as two days because you never count the day you’re on or the actual one, I have been hit by the sudden realisation that I have nowhere to come back to.  I knew this in the abstract but hadn’t really paid any attention.  I think this must be a family failing because both my sister and my cousin left the country with no escape plan.   Cousin returned safely after buying a house off the internet without ever seeing it and she seems fine.   Escape plan proved unnecessary for my sister!

We have a box attached to the tow bar at the back of the van into which we plan to put stuff we only need sporadically.  I understand that my wetsuit and new bodyboard fits into this category but what else?  Do the coats go in or might we need them? What about that lovely wok and the barbecue?

I am giggling a little inside because R has no idea what it is like to camp; historically I have arrived before him wherever we have been, erected the tent, sorted out the kids and the food, made the beds, tidied up and all he has had to do is arrive before it got dark and pour his own beer!

Roll on Wednesday!

It is Thursday, we have until Tuesday to prepare.  It’s Lucky’s birthday on Sunday and I’m working tomorrow and Saturday then going out.  That leaves Monday to pack Vanley and see what we need/are missing.  R decided that Monday would be the perfect day to empty all the cupboards that I have so diligently organised and has booked him into Mercedes for a wash and blow-dry at 3pm.

Tuesday will be utter chaos but who needs two days to pack?

We have researched (written on the back of an envelope) the route and told our friends (sent a text) that we will be arriving on the 9th chez eux (a campsite half an hour away).  I’ve been brushing up on my French and emailing campsites. I feel very proud of my efforts learning Greek, Spanish and French on an app every day, I will be absolutely brilliant when spoken to by a robot.  I can say ‘glass of wine please’  in six languages now so I am practically multilingual.

Still no results in the loo department.

 

 

 

We are leaving the UK on the 8th August at 6.30 in the morning.  We are going through the Tunnel, we were going to travel by boat from Portsmouth to Caen, which is 5 hours but Sunny would have had to stay in the van on his own, he’s very good at destroying things when left unattended so we decided the train would be more suited to maintaining good relations all round.

I still haven’t got a loo but we are leaving the house at 6 tomorrow morning to pick up a tent that fits to the side of the van, I’m guessing I can put a bucket in there if the need is very pressing.

We haven’t actually prepared anything but I have some board games and an app with campsites on and today we bought a nice new cooker so that we don’t get the van (who seems to now be called Vanley) smelly.  I know there is a lovely cooker inside but I don’t want to go to sleep in a bed smelling of garlic and onions.

Starting to write lists now….

 

Everything is gradually falling into place; the beautiful one from Chile, has passed her skills tests to take a PGCE in England, The Lovely L has started her rehearsals for the Globe Theatre, Child One is thoroughly enjoying her first gainful employment as is Lucky and Thing Two was so happy to have his Chilean one here we’ve hardly seen him!

As all of the offspring seem alive and kicking we can forget their existence, plan a route and pack.  I still haven’t got a loo, or an enclosure for the shower, R is supposed to be in charge of that but every time I turn around he’s ‘researching’ something on the computer. My clothes are edited into; wear every day, wear in summer, wear in winter and pants.  Hopefully I will remember which is which.

We spent a wonderful mid week in Cornwall with our most favourite people, the sun was shining and the sea was warm.  We went to the Eden Project to see Jack Johnson who was brilliant, the picnic in the camper while we waited for the car park to empty was inspired.  The only downside was R getting sunburned on one side while he gossiped with the blonde bombshell.  He’s come home with actual stripy legs.

We collected the Wanted on Voyage box from storage today but I was so tired after getting lost walking the dogs that it will have to wait until tomorrow to find out what I put in there.

A big issue for me at the moment is the lack of a loo on board, I’ve been checking out the camper stops in Europe and they don’t all have toilets.  Do I take a camping toilet or not?  My 20 year old self says not to be silly but  climbing down from the bed in the roof, over the front seats and across a massive car park may prove more tricky than my 53 year old bladder can manage.

More research required in this department.

After weeks of stress and tension, a promise of completion on Friday,  arrangement of a celebratory barbecue for retirement, one stupid bastard didn’t sign the paperwork and we spent the entire weekend and all of Monday thinking the whole thing may be cancelled.

But, on Tuesday at 1pm we got the call, the shop is sold and R is now unemployed.  Never again will he have to work a 16 hour day on his feet in searing temperatures, the only heat he will have to contend with will be of his own choosing.  He finished the day, arrived home as England were taking their penalties, had a shower, packed some clean pants and a toothbrush, watched England win, climbed into Wolfie and drove to Cornwall.    All in all a good day!

 

 

We collected our beautiful shiny new Wolfie yesterday from Mercedes in Newbury, the shop where R saw a camper van in the window on the way past and decided to do a U turn on the main road so he could go in and see it.  Ours is nicer than the display one because it is blue and it sparkles in the sunshine.  We put petrol in it, collected my Mother and drove to an industrial estate on Hayling Island.  An inspired first trip.

R is completing on the shop which means that today is his last day as a business owner, he will work for the weekend handing over but today is his actual last day and he left so early I wasn’t properly awake to appreciate the moment.

We have put the camper van away so it doesn’t get dirty and will have to drive our ordinary crappy cars for work but on Tuesday we are taking it to show the Blonde Bombshell in Cornwall, we’ll fill him with alcohol and take him on his first proper drive.  We won’t be sleeping in him, just in case we hate it and want to change our minds, we will leave that until we arrive in France, or Belgium,  we haven’t mapped out the trip yet, I think that will be the first major row. Hopefully J will be able to help us get organised, after all he is king of the itinerary!

Mother is repaired and I have returned to the FG having had a particularly chaotic week culminating in a Father’s Day visit to my darling dad who didn’t know who I was.  Next week shall be better.

I don’t want to jinx anything but we are so very nearly on single digits until the shop completes and Wolfie arrives.  We have bought almost everything we need now but we aren’t going to sleep in him until we actually go, just in case we hate it!

This week I got  my new glasses, they’re varifocals so feeling slightly nauseous and walking funny which I’m assured will only last three weeks.  Hopefully they won’t make my travel sickness worse (which I’ve not mentioned).

Starting to get excited now…

Kurt shall now be called Wolfgang, Wolfi for short.  The reason for the change is that we are not having our original van,  we can’t wait until November, we have a different one.  I’m not sure that I quite understand what the issue was but there was a queue and we jumped it.  The chassis number of the new van is WOF and some numbers so Wolfi it is.

He shall arrive on the 14th of June but we won’t collect him until the shop is sold. This being an exciting and fitting way to celebrate the beginning of our next chapter, I bought a duvet and am given to understand that it can stay on the bed when the roof is closed, R bought a frying pan and spent two hours watching youtube videos to learn how to use it.

I on the other hand am planning to learn how to use this computer properly so that I can post pictures of our journey and show off the crocheted bunting my friend Sarah is making me.

Things seem to be moving at last, Kurt – well a new updated version of Kurt will arrive in four weeks.  It would appear that the factory have an almost ready van that we can have next month.  Ok so it will be a bit different from the Kurt we ordered; it will have black leather seats, not cream, a darker floor and a tow bar  for the yacht (not a toe bar as Lucky thought, for us to have our nails painted before getting on said yacht). We don’t have a yacht but now that we will have the tow bar it seems only reasonable that we should get one.  It will also have a water heater so we can shower with hot water, hopefully it will not matter that it’s an outdoor shower.

We shall go to the nice man at the shop and sign another piece of paper but only if he promises it will be ready. I shall still call him Herr Kurt because he will be even more austere with his black interior. I am currently looking for cushions with tassels to decorate him.

I lost a dear friend on Sunday, she was 93 and lovely and would sing to me when she was having her hair done,  I will miss her.

Ema had her little boy yesterday so big congratulations are owed to her, I can’t wait to meet him and spoil him rotten!